Thursday, January 24, 2019



FEELING: We got the wagon repaired two weeks ago (see this post for more details), but I'm still working with the insurance to get our deductible reimbursed by the truck driver. It's been a little bit of a nightmare because he denies anything happened. I'm beyond frustrated by the situation and can't wait for it all to be settled.

THANKFUL FOR: I'd say the Winter weather in Delaware has been fairly mild until that last "arctic blast" hit Sunday night. Woof! It's clear Beesly's joints weren't pleased with the temperature shift because as soon as we got out of bed and made our way downstairs, our poor girl wiped out twice and had a hard time lifting her body up off the ground. I'd forgotten how the cold weather wreaks havoc on her joints and seeing her struggle like she did made me worry. After asking for recommendations on Instagram, many dog owners weighed in and suggested CBD oil for pups. Sweet Bee despises pills and takes her glucosamine chews with great hesitation, so the idea of being able to mix the oil with her meals sounds fantastic. At ten years young, I know we can't expect much, but I'm hopeful this will help in some way.

THINKING ABOUT: Max had his first tot soccer class last Sunday and when we left the parks and recreation facility it had me wishing I would have looked for something like a cooking or art class instead. Ha Ha! I was hopeful I'd be texting family members pictures and videos, but that's a bit difficult when your kid is glued to you on the bench with tears streaming down his cheeks because he suddenly has zero interest in kicking a ball, making friends, etc. Oy! To make matters worse, my athleticism is non-existent, so wearing tennis shoes to the event is about as sporty as things got. Thankfully, our friends enrolled their son as well (he's an extroverted little gem who had a BLAST!), so I had some support on the sideline. I went back and forth trying to decide if I should ignore Max's behavior, bribe him with all the things, or drag him out on the court. Parenthood is tricky. You never know if you're helping your child or scarring them for life. In the case of tot soccer, it's a toss-up. But we'll be back next week. Maybe he'll want to participate then?!

READING: I've been thinking a lot about the following Pema Chodron passage. While I didn't really make a resolution for the new year, I think it's no surprise that I wrote these words down on December 31st. 

"We think that the point is to pass the test or overcome the problem, but the truth is that things don't really get solved. They come together and they fall apart. Then they come together and fall apart again. It's just like that. The healing comes from letting there be room for all of this to happen: room for grief, for relief, for misery, for joy."
As a recovering perfectionist with the disease to please, I'm always looking for ways in which I've "passed the test." You know, based on how much effort I put into something, the results should reflect in my work and show how much I care or how much I tried. Right?? For instance, if Max has another public outburst and I can't manage him as well as I'd like to in front of an audience, I must not be doing this whole mom thing correctly. I need to work harder. Perhaps there's another parenting article or book for that? Ha! Or how about that unfortunate meltdown I had in front of my mom and sister on Christmas Eve? I took great pride in wrapping presents and prepping our house for guests. I thought everything was set to be perfect, but deep down I had a lot going on in my own head and no matter how lovely the stairway looked bedecked in garland, letting them see me get overwhelmed felt like I ruined the entire holiday. Oh, the drama! Because if things appear great and I give the impression I'm chill and present (when I'm totally not!), then maybe I can convince myself and everyone else that I'm not sad about my husband leaving or that I felt a lot of pressure to get our first Christmas in our first home just right. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I need/want to give up on my hunt for perfection and let life come together and fall apart as it's intended because it WILL come together and it WILL fall apart and that's not a reflection of me, that's just life.

LISTENING TO: I was thumbing through the latest issue of Real Simple when Ingrid Fetell Lee's home stopped me in my tracks. Holy WOW, the color!! In that moment I knew very little, but she just seemed like a woman after my own heart. I didn't make it through the entire article before I had to Google her. My search led me to a TED Talk the author gave last year in which she discusses joy, specifically where it's hidden and how to find it. If you have a chance, be sure to listen to it here. For many of us, it explains our shared affinity for things like stripes and polka-dots. Her studies were so fascinating to me, I knew the 13-minute video wasn't enough and ordered a copy of her book, Joyful, to learn more.

WATCHING: In an attempt to keep ourselves distracted before Flyboy's departure, we began watching Shameless and I'm a slightly embarrassed to admit that we're obsessed with the whole Gallagher clan. We managed to blaze through the first seven seasons together (don't do the math; we wasted A LOT of time watching it!) and it's giving us something to do while we're apart as well. I don't think I've ever watched a show with characters quite this dysfunctional, but here we are. There's just something endearing about the family and once you get past the shock of the first few seasons, NOTHING surprises you anymore. Have you watched the series? Thoughts?

: Here's the deal, we've been eating our feelings around here a lot lately. I'm not proud of it and neither are my tight-fitting jeans, but there's a silver lining. In the week leading up to Flyboy's farewell, I decided we needed some chocolate chip cookies in our life, so I began Googling recipes based on the ingredients we had available in our pantry. Enter Lil Luna's Best Chocolate Chip Cookies Recipe. Now, stop what you're doing, click on the link I just shared, and bookmark it. Hell, get in the kitchen RIGHT NOW and whip them up if you can. They are THAT good. Sweet readers, I've never met a chocolate chip cookie that is so soft and chewy with the perfect blend of salty and sweet. Believe me when I say that if finding this recipe is my greatest success of 2019, I'm totally okay with it. These are OUTSTANDING!!

: A few months ago, I bought a cheap set of gold metal straws on Amazon because Max and I were blowing through boxes of paper straws left and right. Considering the cheap price tag, I kept my expectations pretty low, but felt it was worth a shot. You guys, if you want any ol' regular day to feel fancy, buy a set of these bad boys!! Sure, saving the sea turtles is great, but a cool to your lips Key Lime La Croix is the real MVP. Just kidding, I'm all about mother earth, but a durable and snazzy reusable straw isn't too shabby either.

How are you feeling today? What are you up to? Thanks for stopping by!! 

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